The Mirror Calculator Fatwah

The Mirror has dared to describe Tim Yeo the political genius as 'dim.'

This is outrageous! OK, so he may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer when in comes to the Interwebnet, but he and his cohorts managed to oust their leader with careful management of a total non-issue, and that's a pretty darn clever thing to do in my book.

Who is this Paul Gilfeather person anyway? Ah, I see, he's one of those bile-spitting anti-war Osama-lovers. He'll be the first against the wall when the Tories win the next election, you mark my words... but in the meantime I urge all Tim Yeo fans and stalkers to infiltrate the offices of The Mirror and destroy each and every calculator they can find.

Unlike Tim Yeo, these simpletons can't do sums about patient numbers and waiting times in their head, so without their calculators, they'll be lost. Then we'll find out who's smart and who's not.

'Dim' indeed...

Tim Yeo: one year on

Can it really be true? Has it really been 9 months since I first tussled with Tim Yeo? We could have had an entire baby by now!

All I wanted was one lousy apology....

Tim Yeo defends education voucher/passport/gift-certificate scheme

Remember folks, it's not vouchers anymore, it's passports. Vouchers sound cheap and nasty and can only be used in select number of locations. Passports are offical and empowering and can be used anywhere. Well, anywhere the Tories are in charge, which makes in anywhen really.

Because it will happen. And sometime soon. The Tories have a clear vision for this country. And they've got Tim Yeo. What could pobbislye ga wranbg?

Perhaps the grand exhalted Minister For Everything can apply the same scheme to hospital care. You just carry your Medical Passport everywhere. It can be kind of like an ID card - except called something else - and it can carry your DNA and medical records and tax records and stuff. And when you get sick, you use a little bit of the tax you've paid into the health system to pay for your hospital care. And if you don't work and don't pay tax or are one of those spongers that is sick so often that you can't work and pay tax (and or you just run out of Magic Passport Dollars), then you get what you deserve. Dead.

It's the only fair system, really - and Tim's the man to make it happen.